School is kicking my butt. I'm almost certain I'll never take more than one summer class ever again.
My child will be 2 1/2 on July 6th and he's driving me nuts. Seriously. Maybe saying that makes me the Bad Parent of the Year but at this point I'm too tired to care. In order to get any studying done I have to ship him to his grandma's, which he loves, but makes me feel guilty. Why is it that no one tells you before you have kids that the feeling you get the most after love is guilt?
He's taken to whining. I HATE whining. I can handle screaming better that whining. And I have no idea how to make him knock it off. I don't even know if he knows he's doing it.
My husband is acting like a 2 year old. He has these little tantrums. I don't deal with 35 year old men who throw tantrums. If he wants to have his little hissy fits it's fine, but he can do it on his own time. I'm not sure how much longer I'm going to put up with his crap before I blow my top. I'm starting to think I'm not cut out to be married. I may be too damn independent and not nearly patient enough. And between trying to balance school, my child and the household crap I don't have the desire or the energy to try and change my personality now. Besides I like who I am. The issue is I don't give a damn if anyone else does.
Thanks to my mother and her incessant nitpicking I also feel awful b/c my house isn't spotless. It isn't dirty per say, just cluttered. I'm starting to think if I have to clean my house to have you over, I just don't want you in my house.
Alright I'm done bitching for a minute. But it's only 11 am, still plenty of time for things to go to hell. I also feel guilty for bitching at all when I know there are people out there who have it way worse than I do. But I still get to have bad days right?
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1 comment:
The whining is actually easy to handle. Kids that age are incessant whiners. But see, "whinyboxes don't get to" do special things, fun things, or enjoy special treats. When he starts whining, remind him why he doesn't want to be a whinybox - and stick to it. He's at the temper tantrum age too, so if the whining goes over into that when he doesn't get his way, well, he can pitch his fit in his room where you don't have to hear it or pay it the attention it doesn't deserve. The whining will be over in a matter of weeks and the temper tantrums right behind it.
The husband - probably just as overwhelmed as you are and taking it out differently. Don't take it off of him, because if you do that teaches him that that's how to get what he wants from you (same with the kid). Y'all need some alone time away from everything. Odds are he's feeling the same changes you are - the honeymoon is over and now he is - just as you are -facing the marriage-and-raising-a-family-is-really-hard-work adjustment stage. You guys really need to take whatever time and energy it takes to find your common ground and be a team in life, in parenting, in your studies, in everything. In marriage you can't afford to quibble over the little stuff. The most important thing to remember is that both of you have to be prepared to put the good of "we" ahead of the good of "me". Not always easy, but marriage isn't always easy and it won't last without that commitment and follow-through. But if you can accomplish that, it will be well worth it for you both.
MIL can back off if she's nitpicking. Sure you want to keep the peace but that's not a way for her to keep peace with you, is it? A good heart-to-heart with her would be a good start. But if she continues to criticize, you really don't have to invite her over too much.
Guilt: just goes with being a mom. Just make sure you don't pass any of it over to your kids.
And you'll be fine. You're just a typical overworked woman worn down by the realtime demands of a world that thinks you're supposed to handle everything and need nothing. Don't let the world get away with thinking that. Cause it's bullshit.
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